Monday, 14 January 2013

India 2019 - UPA IV continues


The ever charismatic Dr.Rahul Gandhi, leads the Loksabha elections throughout the country for the UPA. Deciding to go with allies in various states, the Youth Icon stitches key alliances in states including TamilNadu, Andhra Pradesh, Kerala, Karnataka, Maharastra, Bihar, UP and decides to go alone in Goa, Rajasthan, Punjab, Gujarat, Assam, Himachal, Orissa, MP, Bengal the major states and goes to polls. The idea of uniting the secular forces under its umbrella has worked with the voters who in the hope of gettng their daughters married to the Youth Icon has made the UPA successful again. Dr.Rahul is credited for this win and national media goes into wild orgasms with pleasures of praising Dr.Rahul for 3months continuously. 

Several important items are not broadcasted, a few of which include 
1.Killing of 500jawans by the Pakistan army,
2.Multiple gangrapes daily occuring in the buses in the Capital city
3.Killings of Hindus as declared by Owaisi
4.20sucide bombings in different parts of the country
5.$2billion aid to Pakistan by India as a measure of friendship building
6.Demilitarization of Siachen, Gifting of sir creek, withdrawal troops from kashmir, Northeast.
7.Illegal transfer of the Padmanabha Swamy temple wealth to Swiss in a strange millitant attack
8.Attack on Subramanium Swamy, Ramdev, Modi by Pakistani terrorists

The sleeping media in between wants to keep the citizens informed about the key news stories
1.Alleged link of RSS in the Malegaon Blasts
2.Modi's faint link to the Godhra Carnage
3.SC clean chit to Mulayam, Jayalitha, Sonia Gandhi, Rahul Gandhi and all other UPA supporters including Kanimozi, Raja, Kalmadi and the list continues.
4.SC order that BJP is a communal party and not to enter the parliament tll it is cleared of communal charges
5.Sanction of building churches and mosques in tirumala 7hills as per part of election manifesto
6.Attack of one muslim boy by the majority community

The energized India under the leadership of Dr.Rahul hopes for a very bright future for years to come. With the expert advise of the President as part of loyalty to the family and also to reduce the fiscal deficit, a ammendment is bought that election is held once every 10years hence forth and the bill is passed unopposed. This being a miracle becaue BJP couldnot enter the parliament, SP and other parties are purchasd by Congress through online bidding process. Congress wanted to put 20years as the time betweeen elections, but because of the outside protests the time is limited to 10years.

The CAG has been made a 100member body, Kalmadi made the IOC president, Raja made the Spectrum incharges with their vast experience have been ordered by the high command to fill the coffers of the party which got drained due to the heavy election expenses. New set of scams and new reforms have increased the inflation to 40%. The price of petrol is Rs.190/litre, while the diesel is Rs.140/litre. The value of rupee is decreased with 1$=Rs108.The Aadhar cards are issued to all the 80crore people including 1crore illegal bangladeshis and 5lakh illegal pakistanis and others. The cash is not transferred to the people as the government has no money due to the fiscal deficit.

Gujarat continues to grow at 12% annum with heavy malnutrition, farmer suicides and poverty. The later are only reported by the media and is continued for the last 7years. Rahul claims that the GOI has no money because Gujarat is eating all its wealth and the media continue to target Modi for the 2002 roits. In a desperate measure to present the budget and to make some revenue, Dr.Rahul plans to sell the small states and puts a transparent process of bidding for the entire north east. The whole media again orgasms with the brilliant idea. But due to heavy protests by the BJP and the people of this country it is postponed to a later date.

All the majority stakes in varous PSU are sold out and nothing left to sell, GOI decides to sell the property of the various temples and as usual the the liberal Hindus accept the point and some minority religious groups protest in random locations. The nation gets enough wealth to survive till the next elections. Sources reveal that Dr.Rahul wants to retire from politics at the end of the current tenure and want to settle in Marituius. The island has been wholly purchased and all the residents are shifted to India and given Z+security by the army soldiers.

With no scams revealed, and only killings of 5lakh Hindus and 2muslims during the tenure of UPA III, Sonia Gandhi gets Noble Peace Prize for the years 2018,2019 and Dr.Rahul gets Nobel peace Prize for 2020. A RTI application reveals the cost of purchasing the Nobel is almost Rs.5,00,000crore per year and after the revealation of this information, RTI act has been termed draconian and in a constitutional ammendment RTI actvists are termed terriorists and all people till date who have used for revealing information about the ministers in power are jailed and many hanged to death or encountered. No Human Rights people have marched because all were heftly paid.

India has climbed several steps down in the global poverty list, but the no of people living in BPL has reduced to only 5%. This has been achieved by shifting the BPL limit to Rs.6/day/person. This calculation has made Mr.Aluwalia the Nobel Economist for the year 2018. SP, BSP have joined hands by the mediation of Dr.Rahul for the betterment of UP and to keep the communal forces out of power. RSS is declared a global terriorist organization by the USA and for which the FDI limit is increasd to 95%, VHP is declared a terriorist by the GOI to keep the secular votes intact.

The master strokes ensure that UPA V is certain but Dr.Rahul wants to pass on the mantle to the younger generation. This means the children of Priyanka Vadra will be the PM and Deputy PM of India. The youngest PM of the world. Also Dawood Ibrahim has been declared Bharat Ratha for the year 2019, Hafiz Seed has been the made the Chief Guest at Republic Day Parade in the year 2018.

Thus India gets the dubious distinction of being the only nation in the world which conducts fair elections but still the same family comes to power no matter what.

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